Anxious Amber
I’m around 12 years old. I’m sitting on the ground in a circle with my classmates. We have to go around and say a word that describes us with the same initial as our name. All I can think is awesome, or amazing and I’m neither of those things, I couldn’t say either of those words! Someone else said amazing. Oh no! I guess I can’t use that one. Oh god, my turn! ‘I…don’t know’. Reprieve. They’ll come back to me after lunch. Lunchtime: What word? What. Word. Think. In the circle again. Still don’t know. Suggestions. Someone said awesome. They’re just saying that because it starts with an A. No-one actually thinks I’m awesome. I say it. ‘I’m Awesome Amber’. I lie. Next person. Why didn’t I use the word anxious though? I didn’t really understand my anxiety. All I knew was that I worried a lot and I wasn’t ‘normal’. And that’s all I wanted to be. Normal. I wanted to talk to peopl...